Thursday, May 19, 2011

clarification, a positive notion

Of late the concept of HIV, and HIV testing has been popping on my radar quite a bit. Mind you, this is a good thing. It should be popping onto all of our radars regularly, and we should be discussing it. As far as we believe we have come, HIV is still with us, and there is still no cure. This is life or death stuff, but I will skip that lecture for now.

I do wish to offer a clarification however. Those who stumble across my posts on Facebook have likely seen the phrase RU+UR-?  What I wish to clarify is that that should NEVER be taken as a condemnation of anyone who is HIV+. Rather, it is a stern and appropriate question directly to those whose status is unknown. positive, negative, both imply a knowledge of ones own health, and are greeted with absolute respect by me. Those who don't know lose some points, and those bold enough to claim to be disease free without having been tested are downright dangerous in my book.

To put it bluntly, I would have no reservations about sleeping with someone who was HIV+ and appropriately safe. As a point of fact, I have done so. Someone of unknown status who plays reckless will NEVER see the inside of my bedroom. Actually, anyone who is reckless is disallowed from intimate contact with me. HIV does not scare me, ignorance does, carelessness does, disrespect and selfishness do. Simple enough?

And so, I urge you all, take the ten minutes to get tested. It is free in most locations, painless, quick and highly accurate. Test, test regularly, know your status. And please join me in refusing unsafe sex and dispelling anyone that wont get informed. When we stop new cases of HIV, we all win.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011


A quest for self definition, if only because the world seems to insist.
Per Merriam Websters:

1: to overturn or overthrow from the foundation : ruin
2: to pervert or corrupt by an undermining of morals, allegiance, or faith. 
1: the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes
2: organized activity on behalf of women's rights and interests 
 1: a : differing in some odd way from what is usual or normal b (1) : eccentric, unconventional

So, A subversive, feminist queer. Seems fitting, but perhaps a bit long. Subversive almost seems redundant, as both feminism and being queer are a subversion of societal norms.

Feminist Queer seems to cover it nicely, and I actually find it as useful as any self claimed identity. Certainly more descriptive and immediately understandable than most. And yet, it does not explain my presentation. Which matters not to me, but others seem to choke on the notion of it not mattering and so...

Femme Queer: A subversive feminist queer woman.